PEACH'S MAGIC SHOW!
by Hoogiman
Summary: Episode two out! Peach 'magically' performs vanishing acts and other amazing tricks on stage. NOT a ripoff.
1. 1: Disappearing Act

**PEACH'S MAGIC SHOW!1**  
by Hoogiman

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Nintendo characters.

I will formally apologise before you read this, for any of the pain that has been caused or time that has been wasted.

"Welcome to Peach's magic show!" said Peach.

The lack of audience didn't respond.

Peach took out a gun, and shot at random places in the audience.

"Haha, now you'll talk!" said Peach.

An old lady walked in.

Peach shot the lady.

"Hahaha… geddit?" asked Peach.

No one laughed, probably because there was no audience, and if there were, they would probably be in stitches by now.

"Can I have a volunteer for my first, 'vanishing act'?" asked Peach.

No one responded.

"Fine then, I'll vanish myself!" said Peach, angrily.

Kirby walked in, and ate Peach.

"Tada!" said Peach, inside Kirby's mouth.

Peach played an applause track on a computer that magically appeared.

Hey, it's a magic show, right?

(None of the readers laugh)

Oh, I'm sorry, Peach has to do all of the bad jokes.

"Now… to make myself re-appear again!" said Peach.

Kirby kept on walking, ignoring Peach.

"Tada!" said Peach.

Peach didn't reappear.

"Tada!" said Peach.

Peach didn't reappear.

"Tada!" said Peach.

Peach didn't reappear.

"Tada!" said Peach.

Peach didn't reappear.

Kirby died.

Peach climbed out, with a beard on.

"Tada!" said Peach.

A 'war of the worlds' style robot zapped Peach, killing her.

"Ow," said Peach, dying.

**THE END**

(fully mildly disapproved by tikitikirevenge)**  
**


	2. 2: Is the bullet real?

**PEACH'S MAGIC SHOW!1  
**by Hoogiman

**Chapter Two**

"Welcome to Peach's magic show!" said Peach. "What a blast the first show was, huh?"

Nobody responded, probably because there was no audience, or the audience were dead.

"So you don't appreciate the hard work that I put into this?" shouted Peach angrily.

Nobody responded, probably because there was no audience, or the audience were dead.

"Can I have any requests for a next trick?" asked Peach.

An old man walked in.

"Make a rabbit come out of the hat!" said the old man.

"What's that, you want me to saw you in half?" replied Peach.

"No," said the old man, "Make a rabbit come out of the hat, fool!"

"What's that, you want me to saw you in half?" replied Peach.

"Are you deaf?" asked the old man.

"What's that, you want me to saw you in half?" replied Peach.

"Your parents don't love you!" said the old man, angrily.

"What's that, you want me to saw you in half?" replied Peach.

"You were dropped on the head as a baby!" shouted the old man.

"What's that, you want me to saw you in half?" replied Peach.

The old man walked out.

"I think he was overwhelmed by the magicness of my magic!" said Peach, smiling.

Nothing happened.

Fargus walked in.

"Your mom wears tights!" shouted Peach, angrily.

Fargus ran out, crying.

"That showed him!" said Peach.

Nobody cared.

"You do now!" said Peach.

Still nobody cared.

"I'll take my life!" said Peach, desperately, "Everyone values my life!"

Nobody valued her life.

"I'll shoot myself!"

"Do it!" shouted some random people who appeared, because er...

Peach shot herself.

"Good thing that was a cap gun!" said Peach, laughing, "And you all gasped because you thought I was dead! It's glad to know people care about me!"

Peach took out the bullet.

"NUUEZ!1" said Peach, "That's not a cap gun bullet, that's a real bullet!"

Nobody laughed.

"NUUEZ!1" said Peach, "That's not a cap gun bullet, that's a real bullet!"

Nobody laughed.

"NUUEZ!1" said Peach, "That's not a cap gun bullet, that's a real bullet!"

"Hoogiman, this is your fault! You write the dry, rubbish jokes, not me!" said Peach.

Nobody laughed even more, because it was really Hoogiman doing it, not Peach.

"K," said Peach.

**EDN!1**

**I'm sorry, that was awful and dry, just like all of my other stories. Oh well, just pretend this is slightly better than the other ones.**

**Review, feedback is good. **


End file.
